what to do when your best friend is dating a bad guy

Jackie Payne, 34 years old

About me:
We care about our friends and their happiness, which is why it is so difficult to watch them be with someone they constantly fight with. Why can't your friend see she is in this volatile, tumultuous relationship and that she needs to get out? Should you tell her what you are seeing from an outside perspective looking in on their relationship? Definitely not. I know you may feel as if you're helping the situation and your friend by voicing your concerns, but unfortunately, more often than not, this will not go in your favor. It is difficult for your friend to accept the issues in her relationship, and she may get defensive if she feels as though you are criticizing her or attacking her relationship. Even if your friend has agreed on many occasions that the person isn't a good what to do when your best friend is dating a bad guy or the relationship is toxic, it ultimately has to be your friend's own decision to leave.

Katie does everything for him. She cooks, what to do when your best friend is dating a bad guy cleans, and she pays his bills while he sits around playing video games all day. We disagree. You must say something.

One of life's unfortunate dilemmas arises when someone you love, your best friend even, is dating a complete and utter douche. How do you handle this? How do you protect your friend by helping her see the truth about her soul-sucking mate, without making her defensive and more entangled with the douche? What is a douche, exactly? Well every douche, of course, is a douche in his or her special way, but there are many recognizable traits of this species. A douche loves his power over you, more than loving you.
More about what to do when your best friend is dating a bad guy:
It just sort of happened. In what to do when your best friend is dating a bad guy this topic with my female friends, it seems to me that men are especially experienced in dealing with this dilemma. Say a friend of mine breaks up with so-and-so, and we run into her at a party. In some ways this is perfectly natural. This sort of stuff happens more than you might think.

Watching your friend make what you presume is a poor relationship choice can leave you feeling guilty about not speaking up about your observations. Give her factual information about why you are not particularly fond of her relationship choice, such as spotting her boyfriend in the store with another woman, or overhearing him speak rudely to her or her child. Let her know that you are honestly concerned about her overall happiness, and could not stand by and watch her make a choice that could negatively affect her life. It is possible that your friend may become defensive about your criticism of her boyfriend, so be sure to cushion the blow by acknowledging her strengths, suggest Milford and Gauvin. Remind her that she is a smart woman, with plenty going for herself and the ability to find a man who will treat her well. Emphasize the fact that you are not criticizing her choice, but noting some concerns what to do when your best friend is dating a bad guy have observed in her mate. This approach may encourage her to be more receptive to your opinion than if you were overly critical of her boyfriend. When you state your case to your friend about why she should not date her boyfriend, be sure to take a non-judgmental approach. Refrain from using an overly hostile or dogmatic tone when presenting your perspective to your friend.

If you've used the phrase "Oh, he's just my friend! Dating your best friend may seem intimidating, but it can also be the best decision of your life. My now-husband and I both involved ourselves with many different romantic relationships before giving our friendship a shot at something else, and I feel like if I didn't consider dating my best friend , my life would be drastically different and probably way sad. It's because you've already labeled him or her as something else. The most attractive qualities in another human, I've learned, is the barrage of support they have given you throughout your life, as well as the years of history between the two of you. Just imagine him as a partner, just one time, and see if your perception changes a bit. Unless, of course, you prefer the challenges of trying to meet and connect someone who doesn't know anything about you. While I don't regret the romantic misadventures I had before things clicked with my best friend and I, I definitely wish I could go back and tell myself that dating didn't have to be so difficult , or so heartbreaking — the key to true happiness was right in front of me the entire time.
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