Maxine Jordan, 22 years old
How do you spot narcissistic women while dating? Narcissistic personality disorder can occur in both men and women. Narcissism is about much more than ego and pride. If you are dating someone who is truly a narcissist, the relationship is often fraught with pain and confusion. It can also take a serious toll on your self-esteem. There are a lot of similarities between the dating a female narcissist, so it can sometimes be difficult to differentiate. In short, narcissists may work hard particularly in places of employment to be respected and admired and become frustrated when their hard work goes unnoticed.
The year-old had a choice: keep scrubbing the plates in the sink, or clean up the mess she knew was awaiting her in the living room. She chose wrong. It was only when I broke down and apologized that he started to talk to dating a female narcissist again. Three and a half years into their marriage—and 13 years into their relationship—Linda and her husband sought the help of a therapist, who diagnosed the man with narcissistic personality disorder NPD.
The problem is, the malignant female narcissist rarely outgrows her excessive sense of entitlement, lack of empathy and thirst for interpersonal exploitation — she merely adjusts these traits to her changing environment. The female malignant narcissist is not just vain and self-absorbed. She is also a covert bully who ensnares fellow female friends, relationship partners and family members into her toxic web. Nor do they expect mothers to abandon, neglect or abuse their children. Yet what happens when the demented narcissistic mother drives her adult children to suicide after years of chronic childhood abuse? Or when the catty best friend from middle school becomes the conniving co-worker in the corporate world, employing underhanded tactics to sabotage her colleagues?
Dating a female narcissist
More about dating a female narcissist:
Only a small fraction of the women I have dated have acted-out consistently on the narcissistic spectrum. I have combined the experiences with those women into a composite for the purposes of this article, and I have attempted to disguise their identity. This composite is the female narcissist. There seems to be a notion that narcissistic behavior is usually perpetrated by men. I hope dating a female narcissist article helps to counter-balance that stereotype. Most of us can express traits of narcissism and codependence at different times in our lives, and in different relationships, especially when under stress. Narcissism and codependence are both diseases of responsibility. The narcissist takes too little responsibility, while the codependent takes too much responsibility. In a healthy system, responsibility is well aligned with response-ability, so that adaptive action can be taken. When ability to respond is decoupled from responsibility, people start to get disabled.
This is someone who continually hogs the limelight, especially from someone she views as a threat. No amount of attention is ever enough. A narcissistic female could have a loving family, but she will still step outside of her most intimate relationships to seek thrills from the attention of strangers. She will manufacture situations of conflict out of thin air to get dating a female narcissist focus back onto her and her deliberate crazymaking. She will make your accomplishments and struggles all about herself. She will continually steer the conversation back to herself without fail, time and time again, to highlight her own perceived achievements or to stage pity ploys that make her seem like the victim when she is actually the culprit. She uses her sexuality to manipulate others.
It's easy to throw around the word "narcissist " around without really knowing what it means: Whether you're talking about Kim Kardashian's selfie obsession, Madonna comparing herself to Martin Luther King , or Kanye West, er, just being Kanye, it's easy to forget that genuine narcissistic behavior is a recognized mental condition. Sufferers of what's called narcissistic personality disorder aren't just vain; they're grandiose about themselves to the point of obsession, charmingly manipulative, and often have a sociopathic lack of empathy towards others. We still don't know where narcissism comes from: some psychologists link it to borderline personality disorder , others believe it conceals a serious lack of self-esteem something self-aware narcissists themselves dispute , and still others have linked it with neglect as children. The newest study thinks kids who are over-praised but under-loved as kids are most likely to become narcissists — but we're still essentially groping in the dark. Either way, understanding the origins of the disorder doesn't make having a relationship with a narcissist any more fun — and I should know. My ex was most definitely a narcissist, and the signals aren't something to take lightly: narcissists have a strong reputation for emotional abuse. So if any of these 15 signs that you're dating a narcissist do pop up, please proceed with extreme caution — and remember, from someone who's been there, that famous charm may turn on you.